Trever Delvar (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
hidden_sith) wrote2007-10-29 12:07 pm
hidden_sith) wrote2007-10-29 12:07 pm
Entry tags:
Frustration boils over.
There was Trever and there was Kale. Two when there used to be one. He had to keep on telling himself that. That Kale wasn't him anymore. And he wasn't Kale. He sat hunched on the bed, arms around his knees watching his brother sleep. That's all Kale seemed to do now. Sleep. They had to wake him up to eat and take him to the bathroom. Give him baths so he'd stay clean. It wasn't, Trever knew, because he knew Kale better than anyone, even if they had been cut off, it wasn't because he was a vegetable, he just didn't care. He couldn't make the effort, didn't want to be bothered with the effort. He just wanted to go away and the only way he could go was inside.
Sometimes he felt Kale stirring mentally, before curling away from, back inside himself. Trever didn't really know what to do. Sometimes he couldn't stand to be near Kale. Other times he couldn't leave him. Now was one of those times.
He wanted to curl up next to him, arms around him, burying his head in his hair. But Kale flinched so badly, like a dog afraid of being beaten, even in his sleep, that he didn't touch him. Instead he watched the shallow rise and fall of Kale's chest and tried to figure out what being Trever and not Trever and Kale meant.
He knew that he had more inclination to animals than machines. And more dark side tendencies. (Tendencies that were gnawing at him now, his old Master's voice whispering in his mind, telling him to come back.) He tended to be more aggressive than Kale, he knew that too.
But other things blurred between them. Foods that they liked, activities, Tobias. He didn't think that he could have liked Tobias. He didn't think that he liked Tobias. The man, even before he hurt Kale, seemed wrong.
Like Kale felt. He shifted and got off the bed. One hand trailing along the wall, he walked through the house until he reached the workshop he and Kale had set up. Going inside he could see the droid they had been building. He didn't know whose idea it was to build the droid. Perhaps both of theirs. But now it lay half finished, broken.
Like Kale.
Anger welled in him and he gave the droid a hard kick, sending its head spinning across the room. He wanted to do something. To take his revenge against someone. Against Revan... but he knew that it would be futile, the man would kill him easily. Against Tobias, but was it really his fault? And what would Kale say? So, he turned his attentions to the rest of the droid, tearing it apart with his hands and the Force, swinging pieces away from him, not even watching as they crashed into the other machines around him. He screamed out his frustration and anger and helplessness, not in words for there were no words but in throat rawing noise.
When the room had been completely wrecked, Trever sank the floor breathing heavily, his throat sore from yelling. Trembling, he wrapped his arms around his knees, trying not to cry.
Sometimes he felt Kale stirring mentally, before curling away from, back inside himself. Trever didn't really know what to do. Sometimes he couldn't stand to be near Kale. Other times he couldn't leave him. Now was one of those times.
He wanted to curl up next to him, arms around him, burying his head in his hair. But Kale flinched so badly, like a dog afraid of being beaten, even in his sleep, that he didn't touch him. Instead he watched the shallow rise and fall of Kale's chest and tried to figure out what being Trever and not Trever and Kale meant.
He knew that he had more inclination to animals than machines. And more dark side tendencies. (Tendencies that were gnawing at him now, his old Master's voice whispering in his mind, telling him to come back.) He tended to be more aggressive than Kale, he knew that too.
But other things blurred between them. Foods that they liked, activities, Tobias. He didn't think that he could have liked Tobias. He didn't think that he liked Tobias. The man, even before he hurt Kale, seemed wrong.
Like Kale felt. He shifted and got off the bed. One hand trailing along the wall, he walked through the house until he reached the workshop he and Kale had set up. Going inside he could see the droid they had been building. He didn't know whose idea it was to build the droid. Perhaps both of theirs. But now it lay half finished, broken.
Like Kale.
Anger welled in him and he gave the droid a hard kick, sending its head spinning across the room. He wanted to do something. To take his revenge against someone. Against Revan... but he knew that it would be futile, the man would kill him easily. Against Tobias, but was it really his fault? And what would Kale say? So, he turned his attentions to the rest of the droid, tearing it apart with his hands and the Force, swinging pieces away from him, not even watching as they crashed into the other machines around him. He screamed out his frustration and anger and helplessness, not in words for there were no words but in throat rawing noise.
When the room had been completely wrecked, Trever sank the floor breathing heavily, his throat sore from yelling. Trembling, he wrapped his arms around his knees, trying not to cry.